Best and Worst of 2014

This is it, folks.  The very BEST and the very WORST that Vitality Reviews has come across in the year 2014.

To advertise more broadly, the best of these 'Gems' will be displayed prominently.  The 'Black List' will be posted at the bottom.  To hopefully stave off some of its infamy.


BOOK GEMS:

1.  Clean Sweep by Ilona Andrews

2.  The Devil in Music by Kate Moss

3.  The House at Riverton by Kate Morton

4.  The Fever Series by Karen Marie Moning


MOVIE GEMS:

1.  Maleficent 

2.  How To Train Your Dragon

3.  How To Train Your Dragon 2

4.  God's Not Dead

5.  Lockout


GAME GEMS:

1.  The Last Of Us

2.  FarCry 3

3.  Tomb Raider

4.  FarCry 4

5.  Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag



Now, onto…



THE BLACK LIST


BOOK BLACK LIST:

1.  The Bionics by Alicia Michaels

2.  The Eye of Tanub by M. E. Cunningham

3.  City of Bones by Cassandra Clare

4.  Allegiant by Veronica Roth


MOVIE BLACK LIST:

1.  Noah

2.  The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

3.  Hercules


GAME BLACK LIST:

1.  Final Fantasy VIII

Book Review: Linked by Imogen Howson

Linked by Imogen Howson

Simon & Schuster © 2013

Hardcover

Science Fiction

Reviewed by Leah

Linked on Amazon

I wasn't actually in the mood to read this yet.  When I started, Elissa's voice was more irritating than endearing and relatable.  Then the action happened and kept hitting at me one intense moment after another, so that two days later I've finished the book.

Summary:

Elissa Ivory has been living a psychotic hell for the past three years.  Vomiting, dizziness, extreme pain and inexplicable bruises are amongst the symptoms she's been experience two or three times a week shortly after reaching puberty.  But that's not all of it.  More often than she cares to admit, she has experiences of being another girl, in another place, where scientists in sterile rooms are torturing her.

Offered a special surgery that would burn out this overactive part of her brain, Elissa needs to only wait four more days.  Then she might be able to scrape together something resembling a normal life.

She never stood a chance.

When the pictures become more clear than ever before--following on the heels of a facility fire that looked alarmingly like one of the earlier visions--Elissa has the strange sensation that this thing happening in her head could be a link to a real person, instead of just the product of an overactive brain.  She was right.

Unbeknownst to her, Elissa's twin sister escaped the facility where they experimented on the Spare children--once known as twins on Old Earth many years ago--with the sole purpose of seeing Elissa.  Just once.  Unwilling to mess up Elissa's 'perfect' life, Lin wanted only to see her sister one time and then vanish into thin air.

Something that Elissa could not allow to happen.  Determined to protect her newfound twin, Elissa risks everything to get them to safety.  Even that may not be enough.

Initial Thoughts:

As explained, I probably should have held off on reading this until I was in a more willing state of mind.  However, shit happens and here we are.  For the most part, this book kept me reading and was filled with all sorts of action, which doesn't really hurt.  Though I wasn't emotionally invested in the characters, I was interested in what would happen next.  There were no surprises here--at least, not for me.  Which is actually just what I needed.  A book without complexity, but with its own taste of originality.  As a sci-fi YA novel, it wasn't bad.

Characters:

Elissa was bland.  I never connected with her and I didn't care at all about her own troubles with this supposed illness.  The fact that she was someone to be laughed at during school never bothered me and I was glad that that part of her life was touched on very briefly.

When her twin entered the scene, there were a lot of moments meant to show Elissa's compassion for humans.  This was mostly done by pointing out that Lin didn't look at humans the same way, and Elissa was always afraid that Lin would actually hurt someone or--heaven forbid--kill someone.  It was at about this point that Elissa actually began to disgust me.

By the end she had redeemed herself, however.  Somewhat.  I never did connect with her, but she stayed consistent as a character.  And while that's not preferable to most people in comparison with a full character arc, in a book that is more action-oriented I found that I was at least happy with this fact.  She was consistently emotional, compassionate, and even innocent.  Always.  Which was a relief since a lot of authors try to make too dramatic of changes to an MC and then a lot of things happen that seem unrealistic for the character the reader has come to know.

All in all, didn't like or really hate Elissa.  Not as much as I could have, anyway.

Lin is a character I've seen most reviewers call bland and someone most people couldn't connect with.  Well I did.  I understood immediately why she would latch onto Elissa.  When everyone else told her that she wasn't human but Elissa was, using that link to connect was to find out just some taste of what it meant to be human.

The fact that she didn't think of herself as human lent a lot to the fact that she was okay with hurting others.  If it meant that they could escape, Lin was all for doing whatever it takes.  And I respect that.  I always will appreciate a character willing to go to any and every length to do what they must.  Even if it means sacrificing others or herself for her goals.  Which is why Elissa's judgements of her irked me to no end, because Elissa does not have that quality (lying/cheating someone does not count, though it could be construed as a baby step).

Lin is the real badass in this story and I instantly wanted to learn more about her.  Which is why it sucked so much that this story was all about Elissa.  There was so much potential built into Lin's character, and none of it was expounded upon.  What a waste.

Cadan is the poster boy for the Space Flight Institute.  A really cute poster boy that thirteen year old Elissa thought was the coolest person in the entire universe.  That is, until he became too 'grown-up' and made it clear to her that she was nothing more than his best friend's spoiled little sister.

Throughout the first few scenes with Cadan, Elissa makes it clear that he is extremely gifted and has a full scholarship to SFI; he is arrogant and patronizing; and he clearly thought that she should just get over her problems and work harder.

The Cadan I met in this book was nothing like that.  Since I didn't connect with Elissa, I guess it was easier to latch onto Cadan's intent than it was for the girl who once hero-worshipped him.  Most of their interactions where Cadan's "arrogance" or "pat--okay, he was a patronizing pain in the ass some of the time, but if she wasn't such a bleeding-heart teenager…  Anyway, all of the scenes showcasing his supposed arrogance were normally in response to some comment she'd made or a misunderstanding between them.  I understood Cadan far more clearly than I did Elissa some of the time, and boy did these two misunderstand each other a lot.

Plot & Setting:

As far as the plot goes, I got no surprises out of it.  Even with its big twist, I was well prepared for it long in advance.  Which was fine.  This is a book that requires more mental visualization than actual brain-power.  It's the type of book where you just follow along with the characters and see how many ways they can get themselves out of trouble.

That's honestly what the plot consists of.  Girls running from the government, getting squeezed into tight corners, and slipping out again.  The entire book.  All of it.  Nothing else happens that can't be summed up in that summary.

The setting was far more enjoyable.  Sekoia is a terraformed planet that is relatively newly stabilized.  Mostly because they have the greatest space program in the system.  Nothing can beat their hyperdrives and they've dug themselves out of debt with this program as well as provided for a thriving colonization of people.

The world building done here was tremendously good.  Enough details to get the basic history of the planet, the layout of where Elissa lived, and the small details only as they related to her.  I wasn't bogged down with too many details and I was given no piece of technology that I couldn't understand after a brief explanation.  Best of all, it was done in such a way that it didn't feel unnatural for the character to be thinking of it at the time.

Writing Style:

Okay, let's put it this way: I wasn't in the mood for this … I finished it in less than 48 full hours.  Typically, when I'm not all that interested in a book, it could take 5 days to several weeks before I finish it.  (I'm looking at you, the other volume and 1/3 of Sherlock Bloody Holmes Collection.)

So I was actually surprised when I reached the 40% mark yesterday.  I hadn't realized it'd gone by so fast that I was nearly half-way done with it.  Which I guess means that, despite having a lackluster cast of characters, the writing was at least compelling.

Overall Opinion/Spoiler Section:

I guess to sum it all up, I liked this book.  I enjoyed reading it and didn't feel that it was a waste of my time.  Will it ever be a favorite of mine?  No.  Would I still recommend it to a few friends?  Sure.

And there was a lot to like about it, once you got past Elissa's issues.  Especially the fact that the romance between her and Cadan didn't appear until literally the moment before they thought they were going to die.  But it wasn't this massive case of instalove.  In the moments prior to that--even though it was only two days for them--you got to see how misunderstood they both were and as you got to know Cadan better, it was easy to see why she would love him.  Why he'd like her still … well …  He did say she grew up a lot since last he saw her … and being on the brink of death could have had something to do with that ridiculous admission.  OKAY, so there might have been a bit of an instalove thing going on there, but it was easy to follow that it was the climax of two crushes that had been years in the making.  The best part of it was that it didn't overshadow anything else, though.  It was there, it was acknowledged, but it didn't detract from Elissa's priorities or what she was determined to do.

The premise of the book and what it did with it was well done, though it didn't live up to its full potential.  That's really all I have left to say about it.

Book Review: Darkfever by Karen Marie Moning

Darkfever by Karen Marie Moning

Dell © 2010
Paperback
Urban Fiction
Reviewed by Leah
Darkfever on Amazon

Thanks to a litchick's GRs updates while rereading this, I found myself anxious to delve into this series and see what she was raving about.  Well, the one time a year I go to Barnes&Noble (none close to my house, unfortunately) in search of two other books, I end up walking out with the entire Fever series instead.  And I BETTER love every single one of them! *squinty glare for the woman who knows what I'm talking about*


Summary:

MacKayla Lane is a true Georgia Peach.  She loves warmth and sunshine, bright colors, fashion, and music.  And it is as she is enjoying all of the above that she gets a phone call that causes her world to come crashing down.

Her sister, Alina, has been mutilated and murdered in an abandoned alley in Dublin, Ireland.  Studying overseas at Trinity College had been Alina's dream come true.  Now that decision was Mac's worst nightmare.

When the case hits a freezing chill due to lack of leads, a desperate Mac takes her new cell phone and books a one-way ticket.  Her mission?  Reopen her sister's case with the hauntingly chilling message Alina left on her voicemail the day of her death.

Dublin has more in store for Mac than she realized, however.  All too soon, she is drowning in a world where the Fae are real, and far more deadly than she could ever have believed.  Gifted as a sidhe-seer, Mac is capable of finding the truth behind the glamours thrown by most Fae.  And it freaks her out.

A chance encounter with Jericho Barrons staples them at the hips before she's able to detract herself from the situation.  All too soon, Mac is forced to realize that her hunt for her sister's killer has dropped her into a world that she can no longer escape.  And she desperately wants to.


Initial Thoughts:

The opening paragraph was as intriguing as all those editors tell you yours must be.  It grasped my attention right away and I could hear this very cynical voice narrate the prologue in such a way as to make me think that my journey with Mac would not be a disappointing one.

While my care for the narration somewhat lessened, I found that the adventure which followed the prologue was not one I was willing to detach from for much longer than an hour or two.  In my opinion: a good read.


Characters:


MacKayla "Mac" Lane is a lovely southern belle with beautiful blonde hair, gorgeous green eyes, and the fashion sense to show it all off in a way that drops every male mouth in the vicinity.  With an eye for detail and a penchant for describing her clothes at any given opportunity, she was easily getting on my nerves.

We are nothing alike.

Obsessed with her appearance at almost any given moment, it was hard not to want to reach through the book and shake her a little bit.  All the while yelling, "Focus!  FOCUS!" in her ears.

There was also the fact that she felt strangely sympathetic towards a gang of men intent on killing her--with the added bonus of possible torture and/or rape prior to that event--when something far more menacing takes them off her hands.  To me, it's strange that she actually wonders if they had families and whether or not someone would be missing them.  And then to be angry at Jericho for doing the only thing he could to ensure their survival…  That was too bloody much for me.

She's a pink tornado of emotions and sunshine and angst that did not sit well with me for a lot of this book.  And her lack of swearing appropriately made me just want to wave the book in the author's face and say, "Really?  She works in a bar but she couldn't pick up how to properly swear?  Yeah, because that's totally believable."

Yet, Mac has a few redeemable qualities.  Like her bloodthirsty desire for vengeance on her sister's killer.  Or her stubborn streak that allows for her to stand her ground (even when she shouldn't, in some cases).  And then that inquisitive streak that probably gets her in more trouble than it's worth, but allows the story to proceed at a great pace.

Jericho Barrons is an alpha male in a way that makes all other pretend alphas shrink against a wall and piss themselves.  This man is cruel, abusive, cunning, and selfish.  He has no regards for another's feelings.  If someone can be used to suit his purposes, he will be the first to throw them into a dangerous situation.  And if stalking you is something he feels he needs to do, he won't hesitate to do so.  No man is more self-confident, arrogant, or unapologetic than Jericho Barrons.

And I loved him for it.  I loved that he was an unapologetic asshole with his own agenda.  The man is on a mission and why the fuck should he care about anyone else?  Particularly if they're a threat to his goals?  The fact that he physically assaults Mac doesn't make me cringe or cry out with outrage.  (Possibly because I'm more on the violent side than not, and I understand that he did all of this to scare her so much that she would run for her life.  Despite how it looked, he did it to save her.  It's just rather too bad that Mac didn't listen.)

I enjoy characters who have clear, defined goals and who allow nothing to stand in their way.  Evil or benign, I will always appreciate someone who does whatever it takes; no matter the cost.  If what they desire is that important, I don't care how they go about achieving that goal.  To do anything less would make them seem weak-willed and pathetic in my eyes.  So for Jericho to be a complete asshole … that was not a let-down.  And while my panties didn't drip the moment his name appeared on the page, I do have a deep admiration for him that is more like the respect of comrades rather than an urge to make him my sex slave.


Alina was the social butterfly who enjoys stuffy classrooms, peaches-and-cream candles, and Beautiful perfume.  All of that changed roughly four months after her arrival in Dublin, and nothing else seemed more important than the world she now found herself neck-deep into.  The world where the Fae walked around in fierce forms that no one else could see, and she had to find the Sinsar Dubh before they did or else the whole world would be swallowed into darkness.

Even though Alina is already dead from the very beginning, I feel like you get to know a lot about her just by what you experience through Mac.  Like her love of learning and the amount of ambition she had.  Her resourcefulness was remarkable, and her acting skills commendable since she tricked her whole family into thinking she was absolutely fine up until she no longer was.  Alina definitely seemed like the sister to take charge and get things done from the moment she realized there was an issue.  And that's why she's on this list: because I liked her as a person, even if the reader only sees her through memory.


V'lane makes any woman want to climb out of her clothes the moment she lays eyes on him.  Literally.  A Seelie Prince, V'lane has no desire to completely obliterate the human race, unlike his Unseelie counterparts.  Instead, the Seelie have a very specific and rewarding use for humans: sex.  And just being in the presence of V'lane can assure his success.  Except when it comes to Mac … barely.

This Fae…  Damn.  Just … DAMN!


Plot & Setting:


The setting here was Dublin, Ireland.  And I got no feel for it whatsoever.  Being a old world nut, I love stories set in Ireland.  Gaelic is one of those languages you could listen to forever and scenes of the Emerald Isle are alive and well in all forms of media.  But this book didn't add to them.

And I don't blame it for that.  When you're in a first person narrative, anything the character isn't likely to think isn't going to be put in print.  And your character definitely isn't going to think more than a few things about the architecture or atmosphere of certain places, and they're not going to describe the entire city in detail down to the last bit of cobblestone on the road.

I like when books are like that.  When they don't stretch the suspension of disbelief by throwing in a lot of details the character wouldn't normally notice.  And it gives me room to create the rest of the scene for myself, with all the furnishings I so desire.  Just as Mac said in the beginning of the book:

"Movies tell you what to think. A good book lets you choose a few thoughts for yourself."

This was a good book.  No info-dumping, intriguing lay out of the Fae society and history, and a general realness that doesn't derail into the land of unbelievable.

I'm not sure exactly how to explain the plot without giving away too many spoilers.  So I won't.  There's only one shift in the plot that Mac didn't count on: her responsibilities shifting from being her sister's avenger to the world's protector.  Only she is capable of sensing the lethal Dark Book, the Sinsar Dubh and that makes it her responsibility to find it before the Unseelie get their dangerous appendages on it.  It's a duty she did not sign up for and one she tries to delude herself into believing she can ignore it.  Even though her sister died for this.


Writing Style:


I felt like I was in Mac's head the entire time I was reading.  This book never read like it was someone throwing words on pages.  It was the reminiscences of a young woman who was naive and frightened in a foreign country where everyone she met seemed intent on killing her.  Not a single detail deviated from this image, meaning that the writing was spectacular because no amount of the author's own personality (that I could tell) dripped in to drown out Mac's.


Overall Opinion:

Though Mac and I are very dissimilar creatures, her voice had that dry type of narration that I find completely human.  And the adventure she's on is certainly intriguing enough to where I will continue reading the series with high hopes that maybe some of her obsession with fashion is toned down a bit more and a little badassery is stapled into her frail frame.

And I'm getting more of the perfectionist asshole that is Jericho Barrons.  Excuse me while I end this review and go back to reading...

Book Review: Ruby Red by Kerstin Gier

Ruby Red by Kerstin Gier

Henry Holt © 2011

Hardcover

Urban Fiction

Reviewed by Leah

Ruby Red on Amazon

In the beginning, I adored this book.  By the middle, it had settled into a more firm liking.  At the end, I slammed it shut and threw it.

Summary:

Gwyneth Shepherd thought the hereditary time-traveling would pass her by, since she wasn't born on the right day and her cousin Charlotte clearly was.  So it comes as quite the shock to everyone when Gwyneth takes a spinning dip in the past while Charlotte suffers only from phantom symptoms brought on by high expectations.

The only person the family has to blame is Grace, Gwyneth's mother.  Having lied to everyone these past sixteen years, it made it impossible for Gwyneth to be properly trained.  Now, she's got to stumble her way through a secret society--who still won't induct her into their mysteries, despite her being the Ruby--with an arrogant nineteen year old, Gideon de Villiers, who has had his time-traveling duties for two years now.

It's no surprise, therefore, when Gwyneth finds herself with a bit more than reservations about all of this.  Especially when she meets the creator of the society, the formidable Count Saint-Germain, sometime in the eighteenth century.  Her mother's warnings not to trust anyone are beginning to seem a lot more valid and the questions mount with each passing hour.

Even Gideon, who is becoming less arrogant and more considerate as their mission proceeds, is a lot more dangerous than he seems.  A fact Gwyneth really does not want to believe, since she's falling in love with him.

Initial Thoughts:

I loved Gwyneth's voice.  Her relationship with her best friend was real and energetic.  And the mystery surrounding the time-traveling gene was something to sink my teeth into.  The beginning of this had me really loving it, but about mid-way through I was beginning to see the flaws.  Once we hit that ending though…  *shaking my head*

Characters:

Gwyneth was a little immature, it's true.  Everything she knows about history typically comes from a film she and her friend Lesley watched.  And while the name dropping of films caught my attention at first, it eventually got to the point of redundancy.  She was also lacking in a serious backbone, but I can't say that much of it was unrealistic.  In the same situation, when it was supposed to be her cousin and not her, it would make sense the amount of fear and confusion that pervades her mind.  The biggest problem was that she did nothing to clear the confusion and she just accepted that no one was going to tell her anything.  That shit is not okay.  I'd have pitched a fit from here to high heaven before I decided to do as these people asked of me.  And when your mother is that adamant about you not meeting someone and won't say why in front of all these people, you can bet your ass that it is a BAD IDEA!  Gwyneth, on the other hand, ignores all such warnings and decides to go through all of this as if they really can protect her.  Moron.

Lesley would have been fun to see a lot more of.  She's about the only person with real common sense, even if she has a lot of quirks.  And her dedication to helping Gwyneth is shown in the thick file of research she does at her friend's bidding, in the hope to keep Gwyneth safe from the baddies.  Again, she's a bit immature, but I know that you never act more immature than when you're with your best friend.

Grace Shepherd…  I'm just going to quote a passage from Khanh's review of Witch Song to describe exactly what I think of this woman:

"Her mother has a condition that many mothers in literature suffer. It is called lol-i-ain't-telling-u-nothin-bitch-itis.

Lol-i-ain't-telling-u-nothin-bitch-itis: symptoms may include...

- not telling you daughter a single fucking thing about who she is despite the fact that the Big Terrible Secret might kill her

- keeping everything a secret like your life depends on it...oh wait, your life DOES depend on it

- ignorance is bliss: because if your daughter doesn't know that there are people out to kill her, it means she's totally fucking safe, right?!"

That, exactly, covers everything wrong with Grace's character.  She informs no one that her daughter has likely inherited the gene … in order to protect her.  Are you fucking serious?  There's no excuse for this shit and authors really need to stop doing this with parental figures.  I understand wanting to take the MC by surprise, but this could easily have been solved by people not factoring Daylight Savings Time and have Gwyneth actually born on the 8th of October.  Simple fix.  UGH!

Gideon de Villiers is an awful character.  He is not consistent in any way, and that irritates me more than anything in this entire book.  When he first meets Gwyneth, he's an arrogant, angry ass.  I understood that.  Because of Grace, the girl he's been training all this time with is now clearly not what they thought she was and now he has to deal with someone who will be playing catch-up through everything.  He has a right to be angry.  Gwyneth is unprepared and now the entire plan is altered.  That's fine to think Gwyneth is inadequate and unhelpful, because she is.  What is not okay is to drop the arrogant facade the moment they travel back in time and become nice to her all of a sudden.  And he stays that way.  Even after kissing her cousin on the cheek, sending Charlotte away beaming with happiness, and then turns around and acts all worried over Gwyneth's safety.  And (SPOILER) for him to up and declare that she's not just an "average" girl to him and that she's special in the end there, I wanted to punch him in the face.  I literally THREW THE BOOK when they kissed, because he hadn't acted the slightest bit interested the entire fucking novel, and now he's all but declaring himself to her.  What a little twatwaffle!

Lucy and Paul were the pair I really wanted to get to know.  In the prologue and the epilogue, they are the most endearing characters and I really enjoy Paul's tone of voice.  And the way he calls Lucy 'Princess' makes the reader think it's almost sarcastic, but that's just his voice and the context.  After a while, you realize that it really is a pet-name and denotes affection rather than sarcasm.  The fact that his voice was that easy to establish in my mind makes him my favorite character, hands down.

Plot & Setting:

Okay, the setting here was next to nothing.  But I understand that when you consider most of the focus was on the dialogue or the events, rather than where they took place.  However, when your premise is that your characters can travel back in time, I need some details.  Telling me what era it is and giving me the dress code does not bring that era to life.  Half the fun with time-travel is that it can take place in any time and your character gets to experience it all.  So give us an experience, would you?

Plot wise, this book missed the mark by a wide margin.  Why?  Because there wasn't a full arc at all.  We have the beginning and an initial event, but that is all.  Everything from there on out was rising action only.  And then the book ended abruptly with that stupid (SPOILER) declaration of specialness and a kiss.  This was not A book.  This was PART of a book.  Which just makes me all the angrier at authors and publishers who think this shit is okay.  It's not.  If it's a series, that's fine.  A trilogy is okay.  But ONLY if you have distinct books with their own plots that happen to fit into the main plot.  Come on people, the Harry Potter series should have taught you better by now.

As I said, this was all rising action.  This was about Gwyneth discovering she's been lied to and ends up being the gene-carrier.  It's about her having some very scary experiences in the past and having Gideon to comfort her.  It's about her using modern technology to try and figure out who she's dealing with.  And it's about her having a crush on--what appears to be--her cousin's boyfriend, only for the tables to turn and Gideon ends up (SPOILER) kissing her.  There is no climax (though there's a poor imitation of one), no resolution.  Nothing.

Writing Style:

Despite the issues contained within, this was a book I could not put down.  It was a beautifully polished piece containing little to no superfluous information and no editing errors that I am aware of.  Which is always worthy of a gold star.  And the writing flowed so well that I truly did not wish to put down this book.

Overall Opinion:

Hmm.  You wouldn't think, after reading this far, that I actually loved this book in the beginning.  I even still like it enough to buy the sequels and finish off the series.  Obviously, it has issues.  Lots of them.  But they were brought together in such a way that I still want to know what happens from here.

Odd, isn't it?  Since this sounds like such a negative review…  But I enjoyed Gwyneth as a narrator--though she wasn't the brightest bulb in the chandelier.  Gideon had his dashing moments that I liked, despite his personality disorder.  And Lesley…  C'mon.  It's Lesley.  She's pretty cool and served as comedic relief rather well, I thought.  I also completely understand why Grace is intent on keeping her secrets, so that was alright even.

My biggest issue was the instalove on Gideon's part.  (I can't say on Gwyneth's because at least the reader can see that she's attracted to Gideon.  And she doesn't get all mushy about him in a way that denotes love, so much as attraction.  Hers is a crush that could become more, but it's not to the point of love yet.  Gideon on the other hand…)  That is literally what made me throw the book.  Right up until the very end, I still liked the book well enough to gladly pick up the second two seconds after I was done reading (if I had it), but once I hit that end, it took me a minute to even read the epilogue.  Of course, I think it was Lucy and Paul's epilogue that saved this book from my 'burn it with the fire of a thousand suns' list.  *shrug*

Okay, I'm done.  Other stuff to do today and I can't think of any more comments about this book.  So go forth and read, people.  Whether this or another novel that takes your fancy.

Writing Update: Edge of the Ravine

This isn't so much of an update as it is an advertisement.  I don't even know why.

For at least a year now, a story I have written under some of the strangest circumstances has been posted on a site known as MissLiterati.  It is a writing site typically geared towards tweens--though it says it is for teenagers, this is a load of crock as the censorship has taken such a dive that I no longer feel the need to visit the site.

That being said, my first published novel was written on this site and with that fan base I published that work.  (A mistake, really, but it got my feet wet and I made some fantastic friends, so I'm not complaining too much about my naiveté.)  Now, I have a piece of writing left there.  It is unedited and will likely never leave the site.  For some reason, however, I feel the need to share that with a broader audience today.  Again, I have no idea why.  But this is how I'm going about fulfilling that urge.  So enjoy my blatant advertisement.

Between the ravine and the train tracks I was throughly bound.  Forever destined to run three miles in either direction to find one or the other waiting to hold me back.  Keep me trapped.  In a shallow bowl, I was kept safe and secure.  With no one to hear my cries; no one to see the tears as they fell relentlessly down my face.

Until she came.

Until she became my everything.

Edge of the Ravine on MissLiterati

(Obviously, my username on ML is Vulpes.  And the cover picture came from this blog post, as far as I can tell.  Though it was created by my good friend, Forever.)

Book Review: Eye of Tanub by M. E. Cunningham

The Eye Of Tanub by M. E. Cunningham

Clean Teen Publishing © 2014

Kindle Edition

Fantasy

Reviewed by Leah

The Eye of Tanub on Amazon

WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD

Okay, so this is not going to be a normal review.  Everything's going to be short and condensed and separated into 'The Good' and 'The Bad'.  There really is no in-between here.

First of all, a brief Summary for you all:

Lauren Marriott is a fifteen year old model-wannabe.  When she finds her precious portfolio destroyed, therefore, the blame falls instantly on her fourteen year old brother, Zach.  In an attempt to hurt him like she has been hurt, she grabs the mysterious pendent from his desk and struggles over it with him.  Magic ensues.

All of a sudden, the pair are transported to a world that is completely unreal … unless you play the RPG 'Warlord'.  Then you know exactly where you are and how things are going to work.  Which Zach does--for the most part.

Anxious to return home, Lauren has to learn not to be such a snob and listen to what her brother has to say.  It may be the only thing keeping them alive.


The Good:

Throughout the first 58% of this book, I was decently entertained.  The chapters were short and easy to read and very simple--if it weren't intended for a younger scale audience, it might seem a bit immature (probably not the right word, but I'm going with it for now).  The world building could have used a little more work, but I was glad not to be bogged down with details.  And nothing has made me want to play Runescape again more than this book.  (Yes, I used to play Runescape.  My father, brother, and I were all addicted at some point and this book just almost revived that addiction.)

Honestly, I liked the fact that the siblings bickered and fought, as that made them seem more believable.  In the first half, all of Lauren's blunders made perfect sense, as she had no idea what she was supposed to do or how.  Her character was perfectly drawn as the stuck-up, arrogant, perfect little princess she thought of herself as.

I loved the idea of ending up in a computer game, almost Narnia style.  It was interesting to watch as Zach met his own character creations.  And you even felt bad for him when his created hero completely snubs him due to his noob level and lack of interesting qualities.

It was especially interesting to experience Lauren and Zach learning to like each other over time.  They each have their moments, to be sure--okay, LAUREN has her tantrums a lot--but they learn to deal in ways better than before.

Perhaps my favorite parts, however, involved the dryad priestess, Flitwicket.  Created by Zach, she's a great healer and isn't too bad in a fight.  She also acts like an older sister to Lauren, helping her to navigate this strange new world.  There is an aura of wisdom about her that makes her a soothing and comfortable character to read about.  And, she and Lauren had a decent female friendship without drama or stupidity ruining it.  For that, I am very grateful.

All in all, there was a lot of potential for this book.

Of course, that potential seemed to fly out the window at about 60%.


The Bad:

(Another warning before we get started, here is where the majority of spoilers come in, my rage-ranting reaches its peak, and profuse swearing abounds.  If you are uncomfortable with any/all of these things, please feel free to leave this review right now.)

Still with me?  Okay, here's the nitty-gritty of it…

A bit of a disclaimer before we start: this book was written with much younger readers in mind, I believe.  Like borderline thirteen, if not a bit younger.  This means that the writing was very simplistic and had a lot of telling and not showing moments.  That being the case, it's possible all of the rage I've been harboring throughout the second half of this book is simply because it's not my cup of tea.  Yes, this is my formal disclaimer.

Since I'm going to postpone the raging till the end (as much as possible) we'll start off slow.

First of all, why in the world does Zach call his RPG characters 'toons'?  I've played multiple RPGs.  Online and off.  Never in the world would any noob even call those characters 'toons'.  Not if they're over the age of six.  This, my friends, is completely unacceptable.

Then we have miss 'Lauren of Light'.  Gag me.  Hardly anyone in the whole freaking universe has a title, but this snob gets one?  Yes, because we just needed her to get more full of herself in a world where she's screwed up everything so far.  Including pissing off the Head Priestess--who gives her the bloody title for no flipping reason!

Another issue I have is the multiple narrators.  In the beginning we have Lauren in first person.  We have her for a while and I'd actually gotten used to her.  To the point where her selfishness wasn't as irritating as it would later prove to be.  Suddenly, it has to jump to Zach.  Cue sibling head hopping.  Then it does this odd thing where another character is the focus, but in third person.  Then it switches back and forth between these three for some time.  We get near the end, however, and it's a free-for-all between five of them!  Not cool.  Give me two at the most, but we get into higher numbers and I'm irritated.

My other pet-peeve was the lack of believability where it concerned Zach and Lauren.  While the bickering was typical sibling stuff, there was a catalyst in the beginning that really threw Lauren in a rage and made her want to physically harm him.  The worst of it is?  It's not believable.  Zachary has no motive to destroy his sister's portfolio.  He doesn't care one whit about it.  But the moment the damage is done, Lauren can blame no one else and so she jumps down his throat.  (Another side note pet peeve: who the hell actually destroyed it?  The book never says.)  To me this is entirely unbelievable.  I have a younger brother.  I've hated him most of his life and we only rarely feel love for one another.  I get that.  But I also know that he would never destroy something I valued so highly, UNLESS I provoked him in an unforgivable way.  (In which case, one of us would probably be printing off Missing Person posters whilst trying to conceal the mud on our sneakers after we dug a grave out back.)  So this opening catalyst to cause Lauren and Zachary to fight is a bit overdramatic and lacks any substantial credit to its case.  In short, a poor plot device used to spur on the story.

Zachary's narrative is also unrealistic.  I've had a fourteen year old brother.  I know how they talk.  How they think.  What they say.  And whether or not they actually cringe if someone *gasp* curses!  (No, they don't freaking cringe.  They've already said worse.  If you think your kid is an angel, go down another glass of wine while you're off in la-la land.)  Zach was nothing like a fourteen year old boy.  Not in his thoughts or his reactions to anything typical.  At best, he was a prepubescent boy; at worst, he was the heroine of a badly written YA novel who is supposed to be seventeen but acts twelve.

Speaking of not living up to her professed potential…  When Lauren is trained as a Priestess (which literally takes one quest and the gifting of new abilities by the Head Priestess) she is endowed with three wonderful blessings: primary healing, inner focus, and intelligence.  Excuse me, when the FUCK did she ever use the last two?!  I've seen selfish arrogance, does that count as inner focus?  How about happily riding a TIGER but thinking that the TIMBER WOLF looked more dangerous?  Since when does blatant ignorance fall under intelligence?  Oh, and that time you totally had a magic shield but instead got ate up by vampire rats?  That was fun, huh.  You bloody idiot.

From the 60% mark on down, I absolutely loathed Lauren.  As mentioned, she's a moron without a lick of common sense or true humility.  One minute she freaks out about how inappropriate it would be for her to be left alone with a guy … two seconds of insta-love hell later, she's engaged to him.  (Will rant about this in a little bit.)  Throughout the entire book, she never completes a whole character arc.  It doesn't even seem like she makes it half-way.  I mean, in books like this, you expect the MC to start off rough around the edges.  Then they grow and learn.  In this case, the reader was expecting selfish, arrogant, cruel Lauren to grow softer edges and maybe come to care about her brother in a natural, almost maternal sort of way.  I'd have been okay with at least one possessive line about him.  I wanted her to come to his defense because that is her little brother, and no one else is allowed to fuck with him.

I got none of that.  Instead, she remained pigheaded, arrogant, and selfish throughout the entire novel.  While she supposedly develops some real feelings for her brother, it shows very little in their relationship.  Instead, she's too damn busy becoming some silly little creature whilst wooing her brother's "toon".

*Deep Breath*

I feel the need to reiterate: Lauren is an idiot.  And she is the epitome of anything wrong with a female lead in a book.  She is not intelligent.  She is petty.  Selfish and cruel.  Beautiful but with a soul that could be worked into a wrought iron design.  And of all the travesties she could ever happen into, she falls into the most severe case of insta-love bullshittery that I've seen in a long time.

Worst of all, she falls in love with a hulking mass of a warrior character that--oh yeah!--her brother created!  And you wonder why Zach is all weirded out by you making kissy faces at the character he spent hours honing and shaping into the ultimate badass?  Mind you, this is the very same character you claimed to be "scary" in the beginning of the book and who was ignoring you like you were something to be stepped over not TWO pages before.  Seriously, their hands touch and they have feelings and that starts the whole damn landslide.  Next thing you know, they're smooching--another of Zach's unrealistic descriptions for his age--and professing their undying love.  The kind that makes it okay for a recently-turned-sixteen year old girl to agree to marry this hulking, nineteen year old life form who--trope of all tropes--used to be a player, until he met her.  Never mind that she can't stay in his world and all…  Where's the harm in letting this delusion play itself out?  Again: I hate Lauren after 60%.

This sham of a romance is what 100% ruined this book.  With such a solid foundation as having two siblings at odds being transported to a whole other world, there was so much promise in having to build up their relationship, after first tearing down the mistrust and dislike of each other.  It was a chance to have them evolve to the point where they could help each other, work together, and decide in what ways it was best for them to get home.  If the book had left out any stupid romantic inclinations, this would have been a great story for brothers and sisters to read together and learn a valuable lesson.  Instead it did … that.  *sigh*

Unfortunately, the two leads weren't alone in their utter stupidity and failure at being anyone worth while.  We also have Kalika, a drow Maverick who is supposed to be a complete badass.  She's not.  She hates herself for being weak and pathetic … but not often enough since she is both throughout every part I've seen her in.  Then there's Dardanos, the love of Lauren's entire five minute swooning spell.  Every time I think of him, I picture the big, hulking guy in the Disney movie "Brave".  The one that is all muscles and not much smarter than a rock.  Yes, that is literally who I picture every time I read about Dardanos.  Not some hot, sexy guy like Lauren sees.  He's not intelligent.  He's not polite or considerate.  Hell, the only time he's tolerant of Zach is when he's trying to make a good impression on Lauren.  Idiot.  And then there's Kirth, the pixie prince.  I actually liked him for probably 80% of the book.  But his own arrogance sort-of turned me off to him at the end there.

Hmm.  I think I've finally had done with my raging.  Other than the predictability of the plot and that ending that made me laugh at Lauren's pain, I don't think there's much else to mention.


Overall:

I didn't like this book.  I would not recommend this book to any of my friends, because they all hate the same things that I do.  I do suggest anyone reading this to judge it solely on your reading experience, and not mine.  (But do what you want.)

The saddest thing is, this could have easily been an okay book.  With more work and less Dardanos, this could have been a spectacular book.  Ah, the potential…  For the first half of this book, it was actually entertaining to read…  Then that last 40%…  Well, there's no going back and there's my review for you.  It just sucks that I couldn't enjoy this more.

Book Review: The Voice by Jennifer Anne Davis

The Voice by Jennifer Anne Davis

Lands Atlantic Publishing © 2013

Kindle Edition

Urban Fiction

Reviewed by Leah

The Voice on Amazon

I have never truly hated going to work before.  Then I began reading this book and anything/everything that interfered with my reading time was Public Enemy #1.

Summary:

Audrey is a kidnap and assault survivor with no will to live and a 'victim' label firmly plastered on her forehead.  As far as she is concerned, that's the only thing people will see when they look at her.  For the rest of her life, she will be that girl.  The rape-victim.  It's a label she doesn't plan on living with for long.

Wheedling a golden ticket of a permission slip from her therapist, Audrey gets the okay to go and stay with her Aunt Kate in San Diego--clear across the country from her smothering family and the man who hurt her.  Her intentions are not pure, however.  Suicide is the only escape she has from this living hell.

Just when she's about to go through with it, however, a voice talks her out of it.  And this isn't just any voice; it's the voice.  The one that came to her in her darkest hours.  The one that talked to her through it all and whom she'd come to think of as a friend.  It was also the same voice that no longer spoke to her from the moment she was found.  And the only one she wanted most to hear.

Desirous of keeping a closer eye on her after this incident, Audrey's Aunt Kate has decided to enroll her at the High School where she teaches--with the neighbor's twin sons, Caleb and Justin, acting as bodyguards and chaperones.

Under an alias, Audrey finds herself in the one place where she least expected to be: High School.  With Caleb's buoyant personality pushing her to start living again, and Justin's antisocial behavior just pushing her away, Audrey has no choice but to submit to the fact that life does go on.  For better or worse.

And worse certainly decides to poke its nose in just when she's finally beginning to heal.  An old threat and a new one are now tormenting her … and even the voice can't help her this time.

Unless it belongs to someone closer to her than she suspected.

Initial Thoughts:

I … I didn't even mean to start reading this yet.  Here I was, scrolling through my Kindle Mac library, and here was this novel that oddly doesn't have a cover.  (Kindle apparently got the title and the novel right, but screwed up in the author and cover department.  Oh well, no harm done.)  So, I open it for a quick glance to see about reading later.

Yeah.  Later.  Uh-huh.

An hour and some two or three ignored FB messages later, I was already 25% deep.  You do not know the struggle of having to go help my boyfriend decide on tile designs versus staying home and finishing the book.  Then to have to go to work the following day…  Life is a cruel mistress sometimes.

Alas, I have finished this novel with much squeeing and many happy feels.  (God, I hate saying 'feels'.  They're 'feelings' okay!  But dammit, this novel calls for a deviation from the norm.)

Characters:

Audrey is an intelligent, goal-oriented, seventeen year old young woman whose life has turned into a never-ending nightmare.  She has survived the worst treatment a woman ever has to endure.  Kidnapping.  Malnourishment.  Sexual abuse and physical assault.  For two months, she was alone and in pain.  The only thing to comfort her was the voice--which may or may not have been a result of her conscience just trying to protect her and keep her from slipping further into insanity.  Audrey is terrified in ways many of us are lucky enough to never experience.  And she is one of the strongest, most realistic females I've ever read about.

There are very few heroines in any paranormal fiction (despite the obvious telepathy, I keep forgetting this is actually considered paranormal) that are capable of displaying common sense and presenting the reader with a realistic situation.

Audrey was abused.  Her uncle has been arrested.  The police are involved during EVERYTHING that happens.  I was so grateful for this, because it showcased the realness behind these kinds of attacks.  And Audrey displays both her pain and her insecurities in ways I know to be very realistic.  I admire this character so much and feel for her in so many ways.

Caleb embodies the classic surfer-boy jock ensemble.  He is charismatic and popular.  Beloved by all.  He is bold and outgoing.  Fun and idiotic at times.  And he is determined more than anyone to make sure that that period of Audrey's life is not the one she is defined by.  His entire mission is to remind her that there are still memories to make and a full life to be lived.  Whether she agrees or not.

Justin is moody, antisocial, and clings to his iPod like a life preserver.  For much of the book, Justin seems to anticipate Audrey's needs, but he never brings himself to actually get close to her.  (Spoiler Alert, turn back now: Probably because he's already as close as you can be, what with being in her head and all.)  And I immediately fell in love with Justin.  To me, his reasons were obvious and it only made me love him more.  Honestly, a more compassionate, loyal, caring partner would be hard to find.  And he's just the man that Audrey needs in her life.

Kate hasn't had it easy.  What with a missing niece and a cheating ex-fiance, things were looking pretty dark for Kate for a little bit.  But nothing soothes a girl's ego quite like splurging on a joint credit card in order to remake her niece into a total stranger.  Doing what she can to help, Kate gives Audrey a mask to hide behind and a little push back into the land of the living.  This woman is awesome.  She's supportive and protective when it calls for it, but she backs off to let Audrey heal as she needs it.  And it is Kate who first teaches Audrey to trust again.  She is a wonderful human being and I quite adore her.

Plot & Setting:

I'll be honest, I know nothing about San Diego.  I've never been to California.  So I don't really know if it's still eighty degrees in October.  If so: who wants a roommate and when can I move in?  (Just kidding, the idea of living in earthquake zone kinda makes me think it's unsafe and I'm not bothering with it.)

The setting felt real enough to me since this is a contemporary and I've barely left my home state.  If it feels real to a Californian, that would be the real test, but I can't say as I'd care.  Moving on…

Is it scary that the main point of the plot is so realistic that the book even felt the need to drop in the statistic that 1 in 4 girls will be sexually assaulted before they reach the age of 17?  I think so.  I find it terribly frightening and I feel so relieved and blessed that I was one of the lucky ones to have slipped by without this happening to me.  I know so many who haven't…

I emphasis that this is a point of the story--and a pretty valid one--because this is not the entirety of the plot.  The main plot actually encompasses a lot of these points.  Such as: healing after a traumatic experience; learning to trust and love those who are in your life all over again; not blaming yourself or those around you for things beyond your/their control; learning to accept what has happened, and deciding that it will not control your life.  All of these are very powerful messages.  Some could have been clearer, sure; but for the length of this novel and the fact that it's a standalone, it's done pretty damn well at highlighting at least the basics of some, and going far into depth for others.

The actual plot centers around Audrey relearning how to act 'normally' in society--while constantly fearing for her life.  There is a threat to her, and it is close.  However, between her aunt's protectiveness and the aid of the twins, she's learning how to function again without this one experience tainting everything in her life.

Writing Style:

I didn't even want to read the book yet!  "Jennifer made me do it!" will probably be my automatic response every time I get lost in one of this woman's books from now on.  I remember the same pull every time I read The Key, and especially its successors.  The writing style here is marvelous and it flows so smoothly and well, there are almost no complaints.

Unfortunately, I feel like I'm tainting a glowing review by pointing out some things I didn't like, but I feel like this could be a reference point, so here goes:

There was one conflict between Justin and Audrey concerning a support group at about roughly 90% into the book that I felt was unnecessary.  In other words, almost everything that had to do with the character Bree.  It didn't seem like it fit and Audrey's reaction was a little over the top.  In my opinion.

Also, I really hated Hannah's character.  Not because she was the mean, stuck-up cheerleader who feared the new girl was going to take her boyfriend.  I hated her because she was portrayed that way.  That many of the girls were hung up on Caleb and portrayed to show that they were catty or mean, or boy-hungry.

Even towards the end (Another Spoiler Alert, Avert Attention Now) where they realize who Audrey is and Hannah tells her, "If I had known who you were, I would have been nicer," all I could think was, "Seriously?  It takes a girl being victimized and abused before you decide you should be nicer to her?  Are you fucking kidding me right now?"

To be very honest, the 'mean girl' character pisses me off to a royal extent and I was very glad that Hannah's involvement was very limited in this.  I'm just hoping more and more books come out that completely eliminate this character archetype for good.

And, lastly, there was the entire 'threat' of the plot that seemed a little unrealistic.  I understand why it needed to be in the story, but it didn't feel entirely…  Almost as if it didn't quite live up to its potential.  I don't really know how to explain it…  Just that the villain was more of a prop than he was a tangible threat.

Other than those minor points, I felt everything else was well-done.  And I loved the romance that came about, and I loved how clear it was to understand Justin's motives.  Ah, Justin…

Sorry, where were we?

Oh, yes…

Overall Opinion:

I loved this book.  I truly loved it.  Even after examining the finer details and picking a little at its flaws, I still truly love this book.

Not because of the plot, either.  The characters carried this one.  Audrey and Justin, Caleb and Kate.  They were so perfectly rounded out, that I feel like I could know them in real life.  For that, please accept my very glowing review and very heartfelt recommendation for The Voice.

Book Review: The Wounded by Lauren Nicolle Taylor

The Wounded by Lauren Nicolle Taylor

Clean Teen Publishing © 2014

Kindle Edition

Dystopian

Reviewed by Leah

The Wounded on Amazon

How can you love someone and hate them so much at the same time?  The answer: read a book.  A more specific answer: read this series of books.  Lauren Nicolle Taylor, you're on my Watch List, for better or worse.

Summary:

Rosa didn't get what she came for.  With the sole purpose of returning to Pau Brazil being the rescue of her mother and infant sibling, what she came away with was a battered body and a lucky find in her friend, Rash.  Then there is the not-so-welcome revelation that her father is the Spider they were sent to rescue, and his loyalty has been to the Survivors much longer than Rosa's been alive.

Feeling overwhelmed and slightly heartbroken, all Rosa wants to do is return to Joseph and her son.  To be safe at home, and plan for the next phase of this warfare.

But the next phase hit them first.

When the Spider collectors return from their mission, it is to find their lives empty and deserted.  The others are gone.  Possessions left behind.  And the healing machine destroyed.

Knowing where the only safe hiding place is, they set off immediately for the Hole--a giant, radioactive remnant of a distant war.  There, Rosa is relieved to find both of her boys safe and sound.  But others are missing and her family is hanging on by tattered threads.

The once strong and determined Survivors are now the Wounded.  With each reminder of loved ones lost, they are unwilling, as of yet, to pick themselves up.  Instead, they are ready to rest, lick their wounds, and drown in their misery.  Which leads them to the Monkey City … and those people that Apella knew actually existed there all along.

It is not enough to wallow, however.  And when tragedy strikes in a way to pierce the heart of every living creature, Rosa is simply done.  Reciting their sworn oath, Rosa reminds them all what it means to be a Survivor.  And she's determined to take the fight back to the Woodlands.


Initial Thoughts:

By the time I finished this book, I couldn't even remember where this one began versus where the last one ended.  Thankfully, the publisher provided summary allowed my memory to distinctly separate the two fragments and I am once more able to give a somewhat-coherent review.

Which makes me grateful to the author.  It means that each of these books flow so well together, that it reads more like one book than three.  Bravo to Ms. Taylor!

(Also, I'm feeling kind-of shell-shocked by the ending.  Again.  Are you happy with yourself?)


Characters:

I don't need to get into how much I love Rosa for every one of these reviews.  But since I'm here…

Just kidding.  I love Rosa.  We'll leave it at that.

Joseph is his own typical, lovable self in this as well.  So, again, no real need.

Now … Apella and Alexei…  I hated you both, once upon a time.  To the point where I happily would have throttled you both with my bare hands.  But now…  Not so much.  Especially you, Apella.  You are gracious and self-sacrificing in a way that is very genuine.  It does not seem contrived in any way.  And after all you've done for Rosa and Joseph…  You have my forgiveness, as well as my gratitude for being such a heartbreakingly complex character throughout the entire series.

Rash, you do comedic relief like no other.  Especially when it is truly needed.  Thank you for making us all just a little less tense.

Again, thank you to a wonderful cast of characters for making this book so worth investing my time into.

Oh, and Este: HAHAHAHAHAHA!  You deserved that and so much more.


Plot & Setting:

Wonderful visionary skills abound here.  The world building continues to be sharp and tangible with each new setting.  And there were quite a few new places to explore in this novel.  Between creepy tunnels to charred highways, it was a mental movie-watching experience.  One I absolutely adored.

Again, no formulaic plot arc to this--just how I like it.  There are beginnings.  There are climaxes.  There are resolutions.  (Plural.)  And then there's that bloody cliffhanger.  (Aren't authors grand?)

Also, as much as I love this series, I do feel the need to stress that is character-carried and less plot-oriented.  This is about things happening and how they are reacted to.  So the emphasis is never really on the plot in itself.  (Just so you're all fully aware of what you agree to when you decide to allow this author and her characters to emotionally mangle you.)


Writing Style:

I absolutely love Ms. Taylor's writing style.  Since this is first person perspective, you get to see Rosa in all of her full, dysfunctional catastrophes.  And you get to feel the same frustrations and bear the same dark weight upon your shoulders as she is forced to carry.  It's a very tangible style and I'm glad to experience it.


Overall Opinion:

Definitely recommended.  The entire series.  I'm incredibly invested in this series and would love to have others to geek out to with this.  So I think more of my friends need to read this.  (Ahem.  Hint, hint.  Nudge, nudge.)

Not My Responsibility

So I'm here again.  Not to review anything, exactly.  Rather, more or less, to educate people (or incense my many rabid followers, hardy har har) about what exactly a review is for.

Now, as I've said before, I love GoodReads.  I even adore and aspire to be as critical as some of the most reviled GoodReads "bullies" out there.  (And yes, even I admit that they tend to jump down someone's throat right quick when they comment things the major band don't agree with.  Yet, with some of the Trolls they've been through, not exactly sure I'd be very lenient either.)

This, of course, does not mean I encourage bullying or even would want to be as aggressive in the threads of my reviews as they have been.  In fact, my very worst reviews have never been written (see previous post: Bad Reviews).  All of which is beside the point when I give you the very straight fact:

I have every right to write the most vitriol, disgusting review on the planet … with no basis for it.

I do have that right.  I retain that right.  And to say that my review is meant for anything other than my own reminiscences later on is absolutely ludicrous.

My review is not for the creator's benefit.

My review isn't even for other consumers.

It is especially not meant as an instruction manual or a vanity script.

The only purpose of my review is to remind me what I thought of a product after experiencing it.  Either so I know to keep tabs on a wonderful author, or steer clear of one that whines like a spoiled child not yet taught to hold its tongue while the adults are speaking.

I suppose now you may be wondering why I am ranting about this … again.  (See: Opinions Reside Here)  Well, I was traversing that wonderful verse called GoodReads and came across a response that struck me as odd, rude, and utterly false.  Without naming any names, here is what the comment consisted of:

"I have no comment on your judgment regarding this book; whether you like it or not is irrelevant.  However, a review should provide useful information about a novel and a basis for determining its worth.  Your review is nothing more than a foul-mouthed rant which gives the reader neither.  Try using the intelligence you claim to possess in your next review"

I was first struck by that opening sentence.  My first thought: Excuse me?  Bitch say wha-?  How ignorant is this person that they think that whether or not a reviewer likes the product is irrelevant?  In a consumer-based society, whether or not you actually like something is all that matters!  And what possible consumer wants to look at a review and basically read another summary?  Because that's all this commenter believes to be acceptable as a review apparently.

Secondly, a review should provide the honest thoughts of the reviewer.  Anything else (quotes, memes, praise and criticism) is all extra padding.  A review could be three paragraphs, three pages, or a single sentence.  That still makes it a valid review.  Anyone who doesn't understand that has no business even reading them.

Lastly, if a foul-mouthed rant is called for, then by all means: unload the fucking barrel.

This person, like many others I've happened upon across the GRs universe, seems to be under the delusion that reviewers are under some form of obligation.  That it is our responsibility to give only clear, concise reviews that briefly highlight what the book is about, and whether or not we add our personal stamp of approval.

Some people are under the impression that it is a reviewer's responsibility to critique the works of others and give only constructive criticism in our reviews.

Many think we owe it to the public to leave only watered down versions of our passionate responses to these works within the public eye.  (Omitting, of course, all those "foul" words which so sting their delicate senses.)

Well, please allow me to remove the veil covering those sensitive eyes:

It's not my responsibility.

I am under no obligation, whatsoever, to write a review that merely offers constructive criticism.

It's not my intent to make my reviews G-rated so that those with their panties in a bunch may rest a little easier.

And it is certainly no help to anyone to simply restate a summary.  It quite defeats the purpose of a review, wouldn't you say?

Nothing in that comment can be considered accurate.  Why?  Because it is not our job as reviewers to do anything for the publishing industry, or even our fellow consumers.

It is not our responsibility to point out authors' triumphant points or their failures.  But we do.

It is not our responsibility to write reviews that are filled with direct quotes, criticize plot choices, mention errors in editing, or applaud astounding characters.  But we do.

It is not our responsibility to create reviews meant to be engaging and witty, or even filled with distaste and foul language.  But we do.

This thing that we do as reviewers … it is not a job.  It is not an obligation.  It is not our responsibility.

It is a choice.  Something that we decide to do whenever we bloody well feel like it.  And the results will be our honest thoughts and opinions.  Whether or not others wish to hear them.

So to say that a review is only meant for a certain reason … is complete rubbish.

There is only one reason to write a review: to remember how we felt about the subject.  To document our experience and to one day go back and look again at all the lives we have lived, be they full of greatness or sorrow.

Whether we can do that in a single sentence, a couple of paragraphs, or even a few pages … that's for us to decide.

But it is certainly not our responsibility.